Friday, December 30, 2011

Meeting the Birth Parents

What a day so far!  We flew out to California in the middle of the night.  Got here and realized the birth was a false alarm, and now we are going to meet the wonderful birth parents so gracious to pick us to parent their child.  We were so nervous sitting in the booth waiting for the four of them to arrive.  The birth father's parents were coming along with the birth mother and father. They had seem lots of pictures and videos of us from our profile but we had never seen them.

We had gotten a short description from the paperwork of what they looked like and were so excited to see them for the first time.  We told the hostess that we didn't know who we were meeting but that one in the party of four would be pregnant so they said they'd keep the eyes open.

They showed up, we greeting them and then talking began.  It was obvious how much they all loved each other and how much they all were in support of the adoption.  They told us how long they reviewed adoptive parents profiles and how much thought they took into picking the right parents to adopt their baby.  We told them how honored we were that they chose us.  That we would spend the rest of our lives making sure they made the right decision.

It definitely gave us some great insight into the whole adoption process.  All the things we mulled on and were worried about really didn't hold a candle to the burden the birth parents bear in choosing who will be raising their child for the rest of their lives.

They were curious about our house and the neighborhood we live in.  The birth father said it looked really cool in the pictures, but his mom was a little confused on the layout of our neighborhood because it isn't a traditional suburban neighborhood.  They were curious about how the nursery is going, and we explained how its setup will occur once we finish the basement.  Until then we plan to keep the baby's crib in our room so the guest room is available for our grandparents, siblings and friends can stay with us.  We shared how we have been working feverishly on the basement so our family and friends could come and visit and care for and love the baby as he grows up.

It was glaringly obvious that the birth parents are so mature in their decision for giving up their child for adoption.  We really question how we would have been able to handle this situation at their age.  They are very strong and love the baby so much; they know the best thing for him is to let another set of parents raise him.  And we are the ones so blessed to accept the gift. :)

The birth parents are the sweetest and cutest two teenagers ever!  All of our fears melted away upon seeing them and hanging out with them for the two hours.  We are so lucky to have had that experience and chance to get to know them prior to the birth.

 The restaurant where we ate. (taken the next day)

We sat at the booth in the back left hand corner. 

1 comment:

  1. Brett and Megan I can’t even begin to tell you how much it put my heart at ease knowing that my first grandchild would be going to such an amazing, loving and deserving couple. It is unbelievable to think that while your adoption journey was beginning a different adoption was journey was underway only two thousands miles away.

    I never imagined that my 16 year old son would come to me and tell me he was expecting a child but the best parental lesson I learned many years ago was to “Never Say Never” and despite discussions of birth control and practicing protective sex here I was learning my child, my baby boy, was having a baby himself. I have to admit initially it didn’t seem real but as weeks turned into months it was visibly obvious that in a few months my first grandchild would be born. The kids vacillated between keeping their baby and giving him up for adoption. Ultimately choosing adoption was the choice made and despite what I felt the decision was neither mine nor my husbands to make and even though we could have financially taken care of him until the kids were on their own two feet they wanted their son to have a complete family from the beginning, one which was financially and emotionally secure. I could not argue with that as that is the same wish my husband and I shared when we began our family almost 20 years ago.

    Watching my son and his girlfriend make this courageous and selfless choice reassured me that as a parent I had succeeded in raising a wonderful child who had to become an even more wonderful man much sooner than expected. This choice these kids made is one that I can only look on in admiration, to give a gift such as this is something I could only be proud of and though I have shed many tears I am in awe of the decision they have made. Although I will miss my first grandchild’s milestones and numerous firsts, I will have this opportunity again. As they painstakingly poured over what seemed like hundreds of prospective parents profiles and eliminated one after another for what others may seem frivolous reasons I knew the kids were ensuring that the child they created had the life they dreamed of. When they brought me your profile I understood the choice they had made and the faith they have placed in you. Please know not once since your initial contact have they waivered in their belief you could provide the life they want for their child. Although I know that in the weeks, months and possibly years to come that they may shed a tear for what they have lost they will smile more for what they have gained and for that I am forever grateful! So as you embrace their miracle of life they have given you into your family, we will embrace the miracle of the lives they will now get to have that you both have given back to them.